home > my stuff > quotes > John's Wedding, June 2002

okay guys i tried but one of the quote lists is a little mangled, i was drinking, and playing asshole.  some of the quotes are missing (note to self: don't use a napkin when drinking is involved).  if you know of any missing words of wisdom, feel free to contribute.

1. Lance (watching a girl handling two jumping children):  Look at those jumping around.  And the kids too. 
    

2. no YOU're an owl!

   All:  A toast to John...
   Smack (as everyone starts drinking): I give you six months.
    
3. G$:  How much do you think I'd need to pay her to get her to beat those kids?
    
4. G$:  What are you looking for Lance, like, a blow job? (I have no idea the context of this statement)
    
5. Trotta: You know what beer doesn't taste like light beer?  Keystone Light.
   Smack: Keystone Light tastes like water.
   Trotta: Exactly, that's why it doesn't taste like light beer.
    
6. Trotta (straddling two steps on the escalator):  I'm freakin' Johnny Dangerously!!!
    
7. Trotta:  Are your breasts gonna be accentuated by that dress?
    
8. ? (As random car stops for like the tenth time on our street) That was the best three-second stop ever!
   Steve:  Let's go push 'em!
    
9. Keith:  Try words, they're tasty.
    
10. Trotta:  Boo-yah, grandma!
     
11. Keith:  I was sober, and I still had this dream...
     
12. G$:  You mean Barto?
     
13. Keith:  God help them.
    Steve:  That's funny cuz you said it.
     
14. Ike:  Who here lives in a dorm?
     
15. Trotta:  You're a gay blade ass spelunker.
     
16. Keith:  Isaac, son of... mom.
     
17. Keith:  It's silo-tastic!
     
18. Ca (as Ike is the only one seated before the wedding ceremony):  Ike's like one of those seat-fillers they get for the Oscars.
     
19. Ca:  I think I scared his girlfriend cuz I said I killed Jesus.
     
20. Steve (when Frisbee lands on the floor in the corner):  That's it's place.
    Trotta:  It's feng shui man!
     
21. Ike (re: Beans): That's the perfect gift for Trotta.
    Nick Wong:  Beans or a dead animal.
    Steve:  Or a dead animal filled with beans.
     
22. No YOU're a towel [or insert noun here, it's funny as long as you use the towelie voice]